Thursday, March 31, 2011

April Swear Word Of The Month!

April is upon us, making it time to unveil the brand new Xray Studios Swear Word of The Month™!! Which means it's also time to unveil part 3 in the ridiculously exclusive Profane Robots of The 23rd Century illustration series and the lucky punter who receives this original piece of obscene droid art.

Thursday, March 24, 2011

The decade in Frenzal T-Shirts.

Australian punk rock heritage listed items Frenzal Rhomb have been banging away at their so called craft for nigh on 20 years. And for a decade's worth of that time I have been knocking out t-shirt designs for their bawdy and heavily inebriated clientele. The various low brow concepts the band has thrown up in this period appear to be part of a challenge to find the point at which their fans would find a design too stupid, crass or tasteless to buy and wear. The point has yet to be reached, and their fans threaten to never crack. 

I'm not sure if this is every design I've ever done, but it's pretty close. Behold, the gallery of Rhombwear [Click on a design to embiggen]...

Friday, March 18, 2011

There's No "I" in "Has Been"

Tomorrow sees everyone's favourite rock and roll marital aids Nancy Vandal back in action at the 2011 Monster Session at Sydney Uni. NV shows are few and far between these days and one can forget just how volatile and dangerous the band can be. However by taking the correct precautions, punters can minimise their chances of common NV gig pitfalls such as demonic possession, bad shout management, and death.

Here are some tips to ensure you enjoy a safe and enjoyable evening.

1. Birth Control. 
NV boast 10000 times the level of sexual potency of your garden variety rock star and require no physical contact to render suitable mates pregnant. Unprepared Punters may find themselves with child as the result of a sultry gaze, blistering lead break or fumbled schooner glass. Male and females are equally at risk so remember your chastity belts people.

2. Absence of light.
God fearing punters should be warned Beezlebub attends every NV concert. He can be seen pressed against the stage nodding approvingly at the bands unholy sonic sermon and pleading for autographs post gig. Keep your soul tucked away safely in a fanny pack doused in holy water and avoid signing pacts or contracts of any kind. Best leave all quills, pens or markers of any kind at home.

3. Industry Buzz.
NV shows invariably attract a swarm of high flying record executives desperate to get the bands signatures on a lucrative record contract. Unfortunately for them NV's heroic punk rock ideals make such overtures a complete waste of time. However punters caught amidst the fruitless A&R feeding frenzy need to be careful lest they inadvertently get signed to a 6 album deal with Casablanca Records. See the advice given in [2] re writing devices.

In summary. Nancy Vandal gigs are a highly charged sexual environment, with elements of the occult and unsupervised supernatural forces seeking to bring about the end of days via sonic mind control and trained bats. Just use your common sense and have fun!

Tuesday, March 08, 2011

Lemmington Steele

In celebration of Motorhead's forthcoming visit to our shores, a dabble at the infinitely drawable Lemmy Kilmister...